10 Rules For Startups
Jason Calcanis and Mark Cuban made a couple lists on this topic, so since I rarely think of an original idea, I’m making one too.
Both of them are about saving money, which is very important for a startup– but knowing when to spend money can be more important sometimes.
1. Create A Comfortable Working Environment: This means no fluorescent lights and no ugly 70’s call center garbage or 90’s quasi-cool cubes. You don’t need to go to Herman Miller or DWR to make the place look decent. Here’s a tip, don’t use “office furniture” at all. Supply the bathroom like you would the bathroom in your own home. Not only do your employees use it but guests do too. People remember a nice bathroom.
2. Avoid Becoming Top-Heavy: When it comes to women, top-heaviness isn’t a bad thing at all— in a startup it’s the worst thing. Companies will often become top-heavy to disperse responsibility amongst insecure or ineffective executives. A good executive will hire an able manager who in turn hires a scrappy yet capable associate level support team. A successful team needs more people performing small processes and tasks and less people handing down directives and emails that begin with “Moving forward….”. Down the road, companies looking for an exit will begin collecting a sexy team of brand name executives from within their space to display value and manufacture what looks like an exodus from their competitors’ talent pool. While I think this is of questionable value (operating costs and bottom line speak louder than PR based hiring), it’s less pernicious once a company is already established and successful.
3. Provide Quality And Abundant Refreshments: In Jason Calcanis’ post he suggests every startup should get a Jura Industrial Expresso machine. Jason Calcanis is the CEO of Mahalo and also sits on the board of social networking shopping site ThisNext.com, which is a damn fine site and I almost worked there once upon a time. Does ThisNext have a relationship with this Jura company that makes these $3,000 cappucino machines? You Guessed it. Even Mark Cuban scoffed at that advice in his post that referenced Calcanis’ post. My advice: splurge on good coffee, teas, sodas, juices—anything liquid. Every trip to the fridge or coffee maker reminds your employee that they work somewhere that gives a crap about them on a human level. Ditto for the snack cabinet and refrigerator. This goes back to #1, if an employee is comfortable and well nourished at work, the desire to do a running somersault through a plate glass window to get home is alleviated.
4. Eschew Heavy Titles: When a startup is still small, the temptation to bag a heavy title is unbearable. Sure it’s fun and looks good on a business card, but it’s also confusing from an org chart point of view and looks like amateur night from the outside looking in. If you’re communicating via email with the COO of PetSweaters.com regarding the sweater your ordered for your dog from Ebay for $12, you’ll either smirk everytime you see their signature or you won’t be informed as to the scope of their role at the company. You might want to order a dozen sweaters but you don’t want to bother the Chief Operating Officer with such a lowly task. Truth be told, the more accurate and humble your title is the more outsiders will be informed on your role, therefore making them more willing and able to help you. Avoid these: President, Officer, Chairman etc.
5. Crush The Competition: If your startup’s field is crowded or about to explode (read: about to get crowded), make 3-6 month marketing plans, not 3 year marketing plans. Invest a disproportionate amount of resources ($) into that time period. Even if you have three years worth of funding, forget about slow and steady and job security. If you gain enough traction early on any competitor will look like a “me-too” effort by both the public and the business world— even if they were first. Additional funding is given to the startups that make the most progress in the shortest amount of time in relation to their competition, not those that ration their budgets miserly in order to outlive the competition. The company that emerges early on as the <fill in your startup’s business> company will win the race by getting far enough ahead that nobody else can catch up. For startups, perception is reality, the startup making the big strides and taking chances will win every time. Remember that tech magazine Fast Company is called that for a reason.
6. Watch Out For Giant Cannibals: This relates to #5 but deserves it’s own number because i’m about to go on jag here. The days of the egalitarian-liberal-friendly startup world are gone—they’re never coming back. It used to be that the big guys did the big stuff and the little guys focused on the little stuff, and one day they too could be one of the big guys if their ideas and products were widely adopted. Or, they could get bought by one of the big guys for 100 cloth bags of money with $ symobls printed on them. Pretend that never happened. Because the big guys have so much egg on their face from buying dumb companies for boatloads of money around the millenium (Mark Cuban can speak to this point), and because they’ve become so, well– big— it’s far cheaper for them to take your idea, develop it minus your mistakes, put it on their front page and have double your 2 year user base in a week (or integrate it into a pre-existing product they already own). Paying you for a product they’ll probably need to rebuild, or at least re-brand and integrate is in most cases, stupid. Your only chance is to move so fast that their efforts look like some generic knock-off (We have a call for Google Video. Google Video line two). Look to live-video for an example of an impending feast, which has already been started by Yahoo Live but I suspect Youtube/Google will be cleaning up this plate.
7. Avoid Sponsorships And (Most) “Awareness Marketing”: Any intern or green marketing person will probably want to show you their plan for “branding” “awareness” or “offline” marketing initiatives. After you’ve told them to never, ever show you such a document again ask them a few questions:Does the guy barfing in the bleachers at a Padres game at Qualcomm Stadium know what Qualcomm Does? No.Do you know what Qualcomm does? No. If Qualcomm made something, remotely related or associated with baseball would it be a good idea to sponsor the stadium? MaybeHave you in recent times seen a poster, billboard, newspaper, magazine, flier, bench-ad, urinal plasma-tv ad (not sure what those are called) about a website, software or service and had the presence of mind to later check it out while surfing the web? Yes.
You little bastard liar :::begin beating this junior team member unmercifully with an item in your office, a keyboard for example::: Jk, don’t do that.
Where is the best place to reach an internet/computer/software user? On their computer? Eureka!
Protip: CPM (cost per thousand) Banners and Ad Integrations only work for companies with big budgets that sell offline products: movies, fast food, automobiles, clothing, candy, soft drinks, video games, etc. These companies need awareness of new products; startups need action.
8. Leave Your Ego At The Door. In a startup (or any technology company) the most important thing is the end user and the product. Your ego is less important than these things. People work in this field because it’s a meritocracy, your coworkers are young (or youthfull), you affect the world and make customers happy without having to—eek– actually interact with them, your startup might be huge or it might be nothing, you might get rich or you might go broke– it’s exciting. But hey, more than anything, this is supposed to be fun. Smile while you’re making sales calls, staring at excel or writing PERL— it beats selling insurance. Be nice to those junior to you– if for no other reason than they’re a job or idea away from being Mark Cuban or Mark Zuckerberg (As a rule of thumb, be extra nice to people called Mark) and because the tech industry is a very small world. Don’t be arrogant: Nobody knows everything about technology and nobody ever can.
9. Meetings: None of us are as dumb as all of us. Keep them short and to the point, or cover everything in one weekly meeting with an agenda, minutes, and bullet points. Archive the notes and minutes not for posterity but for something humorous to read later. No laser pointers allowed in the meeting room.
10. Hot Babe Receptionist I don’t know that this is useful but every startup i’ve been to has one. The storied history of the hot babe receptionist goes back decades and historically was used as tangible proof to settle any arguments on whether the employees of the startup actually knew any hot babes.
If you’re creating a startup, you’ll need a lot of supplies, too. Things like business checks and finance software are important, as is reliable webhosting for your site. While things like custom magnets are a good idea for established companies, stick to the basics at first.
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March 10th, 2008 at 11:20 am
[…] Blog :: Things Worth Talking About: Social Networking, Social Media & More :: Blog wrote an interesting post today onHere’s a quick excerptRules For Startups Jason Calcanis and Mark Cuban made a couple lists on this topic, so since I rarely think of an original idea, I’m making one too. Both of them are about saving money, which is very important for a startup– but knowing when to spend money can be more important sometimes. Create A Comfortable Working Environment: This means no fluorescent lights and no ugly 70’s call center garbage or 90’s quasi-cool cubes. You don’t need to go to Herman Miller or DWR to make the place […]
March 10th, 2008 at 11:29 am
[…] Wallpapers | Information wrote an interesting post today onHere’s a quick excerptRules For Startups Jason Calcanis and Mark Cuban made a couple lists on this topic, so since I rarely think of an original idea, I’m making one too. Both of them are about saving money, which is very important for a startup– but knowing when to spend money can be more important sometimes. Create A Comfortable Working Environment: This means no fluorescent lights and no ugly 70’s call center garbage or 90’s quasi-cool cubes. You don’t need to go to Herman Miller or DWR to make the place […]
March 10th, 2008 at 12:04 pm
[…] the original: Rules For Startups Posted in Online Business on Mar 10th, 2008, 6:00 […]
March 10th, 2008 at 4:01 pm
Good list
March 10th, 2008 at 10:46 pm
#7 & #10 are pretty fucking important.
but right on all around.
March 11th, 2008 at 7:39 am
Another is: The founders/execs should stay in touch with the origins of their company, remembering the foundations and workers who not only are running the startup but working for its success. Far too many founders of startups lose sight of where they came from and why they started their respective organizations. Losing sight and interest in their field is probably the biggest problem faced by big companies, a huge change takes place where the goal is no longer to offer a quality service but rather to reap and yield as much money as possible.
March 11th, 2008 at 7:41 am
Ah threes funding! Wake me up when that arrives!
March 11th, 2008 at 7:43 am
[…] read more | digg story […]
March 11th, 2008 at 7:49 am
#6 is not true enough to be a rule. Take Digg as an example. How did Netscape do just rebuilding their version of Digg? How has buzz.yahoo.com done? There are a million Digg-like websites, many of them made by big companies… and they all suck and fail. Why? Because a big companies don’t do 1-3 in your list.
Additionally, Microsoft, eBay, Yahoo, Google, etc are still buying (and paying too much) for many companies. Even now.
March 11th, 2008 at 7:51 am
Agh, they’re great tips but I couldn’t read them all because the line-height on your content is far too small!
Increase the line-height in your CSS and then I’ll come back and re-read this post another time!
March 11th, 2008 at 8:00 am
[…] [view original post] [source: Delicious] Previously - [CSS]????????????1?????????? | ??? Next - […]
March 11th, 2008 at 8:03 am
Padres play at Petco Park.
March 11th, 2008 at 8:04 am
This is one of the web’s most interesting stories on Tue 11th Mar 2008…
These are the web’s most talked about URLs on Tue 11th Mar 2008. The current winner is …..
March 11th, 2008 at 8:33 am
Thanks for commenting, people of Digg.
@Watch Television, I totally agree. I’ve seen founders almost implode a company fighting over equity when the company is in the very, very early stages. Recently, i’ve also met founders who have a gold-rush mentality and only seem to care about an exit, and not much about the product. Mark Cuban is right in that regard. That being said, everyone— founders on down, should work for a startup for the experience and because they love the startup and they love the startup experience– and be willing for it to become nothing.
@Bryan, I think you’re wrong. An important sentence in #6 was Your only chance is to move so fast that their efforts look like some generic knock-off (We have a call for Google Video. Google Video line two). I think this applies to Digg and Netscape’s (and others) products looked exactly like that. This was no accident.
@Scott, you’re right. I’m ashamed of my fact checking and outdated baseball stadium sponsorship knowledge.
March 11th, 2008 at 9:02 am
I totally agree, especially with 3 and 4. At TSM the only person who has a title is our account manager. You will never see any of use taking on useless titles like cfo, lead this, head that. Inflated and needless titles are a classic mark of a doomed-to-fail venture.
March 11th, 2008 at 9:15 am
A very helpful post.
Thanks.
March 11th, 2008 at 10:04 am
[…] and informative response to Jason Calcanis and Mark Cuban’s posts about rules for startupsread more | digg […]
March 11th, 2008 at 10:15 am
10 Rules For Startups |…
10 Rules For Startups |…
March 11th, 2008 at 10:40 am
10 Rules For Startups…
[…]A humorous and informative response to Jason Calcanis and Mark Cuban's posts about rules for startups[…]…
March 11th, 2008 at 10:52 am
Here’s another one:
11. Always make sure you advertise for pornographers. No successful start-up in the history of the free market economy has ever succeeded without pushing porn.
March 11th, 2008 at 12:55 pm
Also important: learn proper HTML indentation skills
on #5: Google took several (4-5?) years perfecting their search engine before actually making any commercial moves. Many other search engines came and went in the meantime, failing to capture their users. So, looking at this example, I would not say that moving fastest is always the winning recipe.
March 11th, 2008 at 12:55 pm
[…] The lists I looked at: Jason Calcanis Mark Cuban Andy Fox […]
March 11th, 2008 at 1:31 pm
[…] and informative response to Jason Calcanis and Mark Cuban’s posts about rules for startupsread more | digg story Share and Enjoy: These icons link to social bookmarking sites where readers can […]
March 11th, 2008 at 2:01 pm
You shouldn’t pay yourself a penny more than your actual personal bills require. A classic cause of business failure has always been owners over paying themselves. Fancy coffee machines are mindless waste. But I have to admit, it depends on just how hot that receptionist is!
By the way, I love your writng style. Damn good article.
March 11th, 2008 at 2:20 pm
11. Focus on Sales first, the rest of the BS will fall in line. Without Sales you have NOTHING.
12. Set aside GAME periods - push your employees knowledge - either Trivia, video games or just office antics.
13. Run competitions - and usually the ones that work are the ones with no payout beside pride - change them up so the same person doesn’t always win.
14. Encourage use of the Internet - I get a laugh at companies that clamp down on it - shows the type of employees they have. It’s just like prohibition - deny access and they will find a way - and usually work harder at defying the rules than on actual working.
15. Have a porn email list. LOL.
All right, if you need any web development, hosting or marketing hook up with me at fire-pixel.com
March 11th, 2008 at 3:34 pm
[…] Misanthropy Today - 10 Rules for Startups […]
March 11th, 2008 at 3:35 pm
Now I just need to talk my wife into letting me fulfill number 10. I would ask her but she already has a job.
March 11th, 2008 at 4:06 pm
Definitely good advice for startups, but sometimes you get every one of those wrong and still end up with a hit…
March 11th, 2008 at 4:11 pm
I fervently agree with rule #10. Having a hot receptionist is key to the success of any startup.
March 11th, 2008 at 7:09 pm
[…] startups: 10 Rules For Startups Posted on March 11, 2008 by piratenblog 10 Rules For Startups […]
March 11th, 2008 at 8:02 pm
I prefer when you write about Al Gore taking craps.
March 11th, 2008 at 8:13 pm
10 Rules For Startups |…
[…][…]…
March 11th, 2008 at 9:21 pm
[…] misanthropytoday realizaron una lista muy interesante de 10 reglas para un startups como me parecio muy buena hare […]
March 11th, 2008 at 9:21 pm
[…] misanthropytoday realizaron una lista muy interesante de 10 reglas para un startups como me parecio muy buena hare […]
March 11th, 2008 at 10:40 pm
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March 12th, 2008 at 12:38 am
[…] 10 Rules For Startups | Both of them are about saving money, which is very important for a startup– but knowing when to spend money can be more important sometime. (tags: business entrepreneurship how-to strategy tips) […]
March 12th, 2008 at 2:04 pm
[…] in der Bloggerszene nicht unbeantwortet bleiben. Als erstes Blog reagiert Misanthropy Today mit zehn eigenen Tipps. Witzig, sarkastisch aber mit Hand und Fu?. Auf alle F?lle […]
March 12th, 2008 at 2:27 pm
Rule #10 - I support it 100%. Never under estimate the value of promoting a memorable hot image for your start up.
Speaking of promotion and start ups. What do you think about this? http://www.add100links.com
March 12th, 2008 at 8:31 pm
come on with the plugs already..
March 13th, 2008 at 2:06 pm
Heh.
I did a small project for Qualcomm once.
I’m not sure even they know what they do…!
March 13th, 2008 at 6:09 pm
I think that making use of your available resources should be on this list too. There are a lot of programs that are specifically geared toward helping startups and I think that list should be exploited as part of the process– that’s what they’re for. Sun Microsystems has a program called ’startup essentials’ that offers discounts on x64 servers, free tech support and free events to meet ‘missing pieces of your personnel’ and we think thats a cool move to lend a hand from the get-go. I’d be interested in seeing a huge list sometime of all of the resources out there but you can start with this one: http://www.sun.com/startup
March 14th, 2008 at 4:56 am
April 4th, 2008 at 10:21 am
hilarious. adjunct to #10 is also the internet show that has nothing to do with your product and takes a page out of the godaddy model.
btw, do you have a twitter account that you share with loyal readers!?
April 7th, 2008 at 1:31 am
Oh, jeebus, come on: two gratuitously sexist remarks in one post (”women are better top-heavy” & “hire a hot receptionist”. I thought this was misanthropy today, not misogyny today.
Stuff like this makes it sound like startups are a game where no girls are allowed … unless they’re well-endowed and don’t handle anything more complicated than the telephone.
Good luck getting enough talented employees to help your startup when you write off more than 50% of the human race. Idiot.
April 7th, 2008 at 2:33 am
oh erin chill out— here’s a site you might find interesting
http://www.midol.com/
April 8th, 2008 at 1:55 am
Andy, apparently you think women are the only people who would find your attitude offensive…which means you’ve managed to insult all the men in the room as well! Nicely done.
April 8th, 2008 at 3:26 am
Francis recently from a chatroom forgets that he’s now on a website. Being offended and seeing injustice in everything is an insult to everyone around you. Lighten up.
If you don’t get a kick out of what I wrote, sorry, see that icon that’s shaped like a house at the top of your browser? Click there and return to NPR.
April 13th, 2008 at 10:12 pm
[…] 10 Rules For Startups by Andy Fox […]
April 16th, 2008 at 9:30 pm
[…] Diez reglas para las nuevas empresas por Andy Fox […]