Misanthropy Today

Trader Christopher Lotito watches the numbers fall as he works on the floor of the New York Stock Exchange, Thursday Oct. 9, 2008. Hey Chris, how about making your face a little red or put your head in your fucking hand? People are losing money and you’re making a face like you just saw a weather report that said there’d be “a little drizzle” this weekend. It’s flooding Chris. In shit. And it’s your fault.

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Oldest fake-cry trick in the book being executed by a balding New York Stock Exchange trader following the end of the trading session in New York October 9, 2008. Covering your eyes is the perfect way to cover non-tears. If you’re really crying let’s see the red eyes and liquid pal. And what’s that plaque still doing up behind you? Tear it down and throw it through the front window.

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Specialist Gregg Reilley “thinks he just has something in his eye” as he works at his post on the floor of the New York Stock Exchange, Thursday Oct. 9, 2008. Hey Greg, the Stock Market will be converted into a Food Court in a week and you’ll be running the Sbarro restaurant. How about throwing some paper around and at the very least take your prep-school sportscoat off and roll those sleeves up.

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Boob #898 in commodoties does the facepalm while his left hand is calmly on his mouse. Notice the wedding ring. Come on man, your wife is gonna leave you if you don’t start trading stocks properly! Remove palm from face and start short selling.

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Gee, with all this financial turmoil, my tie feels a little tight.

No your jacket and shirt and tie are a lot tight. That tie needs to be tied around your head rambo style and a you need to be riding on a less important business associate’s back, shirtless,  while he’s on all fours and also shirtless, swatting him with your stack of unwritten sales tickets and commanding him to chase other traders around in an effort to sell them stocks.

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Come on Associated Press, these reaction photos just aren’t cutting it. Here’s a guy who trades on the Nikkei, angered that he broke even on his margin trades after paying the interest back.

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