Antique Roadshow: Best Acting On Television
I just love this show. Some of the best acting on TV. The formula is simple:
A older white person brings in an antique.
A nebbish antique expert inspects it and points out the finer points and why it’s “a great find”. This gets the owner all pumped up. Set em up and knock em down.
The more sentimental value the item has the less valuable it will be. This is a rule and causes great internal crying on the owners part.
After they pump up the antique owner with all kinds of glad-handing and compliments they usually say something like this:
In a high end retail situation or well publicized auction, this item could fetch as much as $1500-2000..
CRRRRRR!!! Antique owner come in. Feign excitement.
Cue up fake smile. Roger.
Say that you had no idea, and are pleased. Check.
The psychology behind the fake excitement is that nobody wants to seem like a rube who thinks their junk is worth more than it is. But it’s so obvious when they’re faking. Stop faking people.
Do this:
grab your worthless piece of junk and in an obviously fake english accent shout “GOOD DAY SIR” and walk off briskly.
As he tries to call you back and calm you shout once more:
“SIR I SAID GOOD DAY”.
In polite Brittain and in 1920’s America “Good Day Sir” meant “fuck you”.
Oh well. I tried.
Here’s a video of some cougar getting owned by this pansy antique man:
Random Posts
Loading…
Check out my friends @ CraigsLOL
Loading ...
“That’s cool, thank you. You just never know.”
Haha, whatta loser!
Haha. Good day sir