Misanthropy Today Hates: Ron Paul
Now usually you hate someone because they are constantly bothering you, and if it’s not them in particular, it’s their kind. Think of Dane Cook and how he resembles every frat boy you’ve ever met who tries to be funny and jumps around and yells a lot.
That’s a good reason to hate someone. If we can kill Dane Cook then we may be able to cut the head off of the monster (the monster being the legions of cornball foot soldiers he has).
So why do I hate Ron Paul? I’m not sure. I know nothing about him at all.
Except that he has a lot of rabid supporters and he’s supposed to be different. Remember that scat film “Bullworth” that every imbecile thinks is great? “I wish politicians could be like that” they say.
Well, that movie was dumb too.
Also if he’s so different, why does he have the same hair that politicians around the world have? Why does he look like he’s drunk on moonshine like every other Texas politician? Why does he wear shitty suits?
But the most important question for Ron Paul is:
Why does he have TWO FIRST NAMES?????
I’m sure that he will say something like his humble family came to Coney Island and they were too poor to afford a last name or something like that, but I don’t care, there is no excuse for that shit.
Other Noted Double First Name Child Molesters:
- Michael Richard(s)
- Patrick Henry
- Dick Tracy
- David Foster Wallace (Three Points!)
- Larry David
- Jon Stewart
- Willard Scott
- Bill Clinton (Hey, lots of black people are called Clinton)
- Rick James
- Benjamin Franklin (Ok, i’m a fan of his but come on man)
- Ricky Martin
- Barney Frank
- Paul Frank (for that matter)
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What’s different about him? He’s honest. He tells you what he believes, what he stands for, and his voting record backs that up.
Before you decide you hate him, it would really be worth your while to read up on who he is and what he’s done. If you decide you still don’t like him, fine. At least, with him, you have a chance to make an educated decision, based upon the truths he tells.
With any other candidate, you have to guess about the double-talk and lies.
Hope that didn’t sound too rabid.
i’m a libertarian but tend to vote (R). I will probably vote for whoever the front runner is. I understand that I am also somewhat of a thought leader and could maybe influence 10 or 11 people to vote for him, but I can’t really even think to do that under the din of shrieks.
Tell you what, send me a really good page about what he stands for and if I like it I will take it all back and write a post supporting him.
um, hello? george michael?
I can’t believe I missed that one.
Tannaz definitely stole my thunder with a far better suggestion, but: Sean Paul
Also, I like that you’ve begun to anthropomorphize your blog, like “Misanthropy Today hates…” It adds to the blog’s credibility, surely.
we do what we can to spruce up the joint here Sima.
anthropmorphize? I wonder what avenues you travelled to find that word.
I was actually familiar with the word probably from high school greek mythology classes… kinda like how you are familiar w/ the term deus ex machina.
I didn’t really do much beyond reaching into my memory… but thanks for calling me out on that one. Phew.
Lionel Richie
Nicole Richie
Brett Michael(s)
Halle Barry
Rue Paul
Julia Robert(s)
Bob Dylan
Cat Steven(s)
Peter Gabriel
Phil Collin(s)
Robin William(s)
Ron Howard
Marilyn Monroe
Jon Stuart
Thanks for these additions Rachel. @everyone, please stay away from these people.
Larry Craig, also. (the wide stance congressman)
I totally forgot Paul Simon, who I heart!
Ok…that’s enough. I think I’m done with this game unless I think of some other really cool ones.
Glad to see Ron Jeremy has been spared!
“Andy Fox” is a double first name.
no its not. Tom Bill is. The only time a person has had Fox as a first name is on the show X-files.
Television is not real life.
Fox is a first name…
http://www.babynamesworld.com/meaning_of_Fox.html
okay.
u are a homo.
dane cook is the sexiest, funniest man alive!!!!!!
and so is ron paul!!!
efff u dane-haters!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ur just JEALOUS of his beauty!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
interesting how you can infer someone’s intelligence by how they operate a computer keyboard.
patrick henry
thomas jefferson
benjamin franklin
john adams
alexander hamilton
samuel adams
ronald reagan
andrew jackson
pretty good company to be in….
Weren’t some of the above presidents??