RNC Customer Relationship Marketing: We Need A Break

I got this email today from the Republican National Convention.

Dear Andy,

As a top supporter of the RNC, I am offering you a special opportunity to help support our Party and give a gift to your favorite Republicans this Holiday Season.

Just in time to complete your Christmas wish list, meet Nick, the newest member of the Republican National Committee.

Nick is a wonderful plush toy available for a limited time to our most loyal supporters like you. Embroidered with the official logo of the RNC, and wearing a Santa cap and scarf, Nick will make a great stocking stuffer or gift for those special Republicans in your life — and is sure to be snapped up quickly.

Andy, we’ll send you Nick today with your special contribution of at least $35.

Your contribution will immediately be put to work. The RNC is leading our Party’s charge to rebuild from the grassroots up and provide the resources Republicans need to block the Obama Democrats’ left-wing agenda.

And for a very limited time, you can still get all six Republican collectibles — Nick, Max, Maxine, Patrick, Victor and Sam — with your special contribution of $150 to the RNC. Click here to order today.

I hope you will take advantage of this special offer. Thank you for your continuing commitment to our Party and our cause. Happy Holidays!

Sincerely,

Sue Gazdo

Director, RNC Membership Services

———————————————————————————–

Now guys, I earn my living in the interactive marketing business, I understand CRM. I understand that you’re trying to keep everyone connected to your product (Republicanism).

About 6 weeks ago one of your volunteers called me and asked if i’d contribute some more money in order to “fight the liberal agenda” that was Obama and Co. I told you guys that I didn’t want to “throw good money after bad money” and felt that you had screwed up in this campaign.

I thought whatever RNC handlers got their hands on McCain pretty much took away everything good about him and added all kinds of lame party line crap. But I hoped it would turn around and at that time, i’d be happy to contribute more money to the party.

You know, a:  “hey i’m still with ya, just not happy with the job you’re doing now. Let’s talk again later”

Now, without doing a better job (losing all vestiges of power in Washington; hence silencing my voice and agenda) you’re trying to sell me a fucking christmas plush toy?

Let me explain how things work. I do my job (contribute money, support, convert people locally) and you do yours (raise money, convert people nationally, advertise, win elections).

Time heals all wounds. Let some time pass–Let time heal.

We can be friends in the meantime.

p.s. what am i helping the party do now? clean up  campaign centers and fly everyone back home? You made your bed, now sleep in it!

Hugs,

Andy Fox

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Reader's Comments

1. 

   SWEET JESUS! You mean that I missed the election?

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2. Nightmare on 20 Nov 2008 3:36 pm
3. 

   Don’t worry, you didn’t miss much. If you watched the news even once sometime in the last 6 months, then you know who won. They’ve been sucking on his monumental earlobes for some time now. The world is changed and none of us have anything to worry about. Be prepared to feel a huge weight lifted off your shoulders on January 20th. All your worries and stress in life will suddenly disappear and you won’t know why. Relax, that is the feeling of incredible change sweeping over the nation. It will be hard to avoid so enjoy it while it lasts.

   As for the plush toy offer, Andy, you should probably just donate $35 and finish off your collection. Max, Maxine, Patrick, Victor and Sam will thank you.

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4. Aubrey on 21 Nov 2008 8:20 am